MNF PART 2 DAY 1 IS HEEEERE!!!!

i loooooooove the MNF.. its like a whole support group of girls.. and because i failed b4.. i am not guna fail now.. SO WHAT NOW SOCEITY? sorry.. i stayed up late doin homework, making collages on my laptop, and listenin to music (greenday and skillet baby. but i like rap too.....). i cant belive my teachers are assigning so much homework. on friday, i had to hand in a book report.. that she told us about on WEDNESDAY! WTF MS. LIFE??!!! we are in the seventh grade, we get it, finals are comming up but how hard will it be? i am really good in english, civics, reading, science, and art. just not math... or gym. BUT ON MONDAY I START ARCHERY! yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! i am soooooo happy. i have been filled with a scence of calm (yeah right, when am i calm??) which is really good cause usually i am eaither really sad, moody, angry, or i just dont care, and thats what i was feeling. not caring. thats why i dropped out of MNF part one. BUT NOT THIS TIME. i am 146 when i weighed this mornin.. but thts b4 i went to the bathroom and i was in my pjs. THERE is something i dont get. why do people strip b4 weighing? i know its because clothes add extra weight, but you wear clothes ALL THE TIME. so if you look fat in them, you are fat to the worlds standards. thats why when i reach 115 lbs, its going to be in the clothes scale. i was thinking... 115 is still a little high.. what about 100? or maybe even 90 (if i can get that far w/out being caught..). i know some may say its a lil low... but i want to be as thin as i can be. there is no such thing as being thin.
Did i tell you about the weird dream i had last night?
it was soo weird. it was about...Brian.
sadly i guess i am not over him. my dream was about when Austin stuck the paperclip in the lightsocket, he died, and at his funeral, brian was there. but it wasnt like, present day. it was more like when we would have been in high school, about 10th grade or so. We were at his funeral and brian walked up to the casket and wrapped his arms around me. then it jumped to about seven more years into the future.. and it was at our wedding.
CREEPY. listen, i HATE HIM. i would never even let him talk to me. so when i am pretty, and thin.... HE IS GONA WISH HE WOULDNT HAVE BEEN AN ASSHOLE.
hahahahahaha.
so what now B? and besides, i like Austin way to much. waaay to much to even think about going with B. my mom recently picked up a new job. they havnt officaly hired her... but they want her to come in today. my mom is HOPEFULLY going to quit her job as this P.O.S diner my mom works for. it is run by Sheila, my dads mom. so she schedules my mom to waitress every single monday night! DAMN U OLD LADY!!!